Among all the pictures taken in 2015, this has a special place in my heart. Farewell Party decoration for AFS students. It suits the post too.
Happy new year!
I know it's a day late, blame it to my internet connection - it was down, couldn't post anything.
My new year was nothing special, because I always - always - spend my New Year's Eve at home. Maybe the last time I went out at the NYE was in 2010 (going to 2011). Five years ago, to precise, and it seemed so long ago.
2015 was a fun year, compared to 2013 and 2014. Everyone who posted on Instagram or Path said that 2015 had taught a lot of lessons, and I am probably one of those people who think that 2015 was full of lessons. I should probably list how 2015 had been going to me, in many aspects.
5th semester was crazy. If you're following my post, maybe you'll ask yourself for me, whining every end of semester as the crazy/tiring semester; but seriously, living in psychology major is THAT crazy and tiring.
I don't know how other psychology major students in another university are doing, but here in University of Padjadjaran, 5th and 6th semesters are considered as the most tiring semesters. I had 8 subjects, and 5 of them are practical subjects that require 100% of attendance to pass the test. 2 subjects are considered to be the most time-consuming, and friendship-challenging (like it can ruin your best-friends-forever-kind of group) subjects. Psikologi Sosial Terapan (Applied social psychology) and Konstruksi Tes (Test Construction). Let me tell you a bit about those highlight subjects in 5th semester :
Applied Social Psychology
Social psychology has known as the difficult subject in my faculty. Actually, everyone will like this subject because when you learn it, it feels like you know about daily life events that happen around you, and explain it in psychology. Like, aggression - you know when you're angry or doing harm to someone intentionally ; conflict - just like in my text book, how America and Iraq things are explained with conflict theory ; and most favorite part - love and intimacy.
Here, in Applied Social Psychology, we analyze cases with theory used in social psychology. For example, my group had analyzed about cyber bullying, bullying, and brawl between high school students. We explained first about the chronology of the events, then we analyzed the level of problems; whose problem it is? Why it can be happened?, and we tried to explain it with the theory; so did the suspect harm the victim intentionally? Then it must be aggression! or are there any main sources as the source of problem? We have conflict to explain it!. This subject really made me use my brain (I rarely use it, like, occasionally), because we were in small group (3 members), and we knew that we just couldn't take that subject for granted.
We had to present our analysis in front of our supervisor. Plus, when you're doing the analysis, you will think you know the theory, but you can be wrong. That was what happened to my group, but the good side is, we learn. Learn. It was like our way of thinking, and analyze were being fixed.
So, this subject was important, fun, and yes don't do the task a day before deadline (unless you want to sleep in 2 hours).
Have you ever done a psychological test? Especially when you are in senior grades in high school, you will have it to know your ability, and so on. We had a subject to make a test, not exactly the same but at least we learn how to make a good test, to measure the aspects we are going to test. My group was in Intelligence group, measuring a perceptual speed test. It would be a long post if I have to describe it (no, actually I just won't describing it in English). In short, this subject was time-consuming, and we did have to put our maximum effort for this. We had to revise our test that had been constructed, and revised it again, until final. 4 months were all about it, but it wasn't easy.
I'm grateful I was in a group with some of ambitious people, though I have to say, it sometimes got on my nerves, but it was okay.
The rest of the subjects were okay. Okay doesn't mean fine, but I survived. I can't say how tiring studying is, I complain a lot. A lot. I'm pretty sure we are.
But on Christmas, I read my dear friend's The Economist magazine about Malala Yousafzai, Pakistani education for female activist article. It made me ashamed for complaining, because she was fighting to get a higher education, for her, for others in her country. She said it on the article, that many of the girls in Pakistan had to marry in a very young age, quit the primary school to work. Inspiring to see how she was inspired by the girls around her (sisters, as she called) who were eager to learn more.
I felt (feel) ashamed of myself. Here, my parents are very supportive for my education, they even pay may tuition. And I'm complaining about how tired I am, without realizing that there would be hundreds of people out there who want to trade their life with me. #ReflectionTime
I guess, though 6th semester will be crazier, and the end of college will be making me cry, I should remind myself to be grateful.
Social Life Itself
I met a lot of people.
Joined two committees for AFS were the best choice I made in 2015. Met amazing people, returnees from so many countries, and also intercultural learning that I hear during the Pre-Departure National Orientation. I always love intercultural things, never fail to fascinate me.
You win some, and lose some, they said.
All the routines, and new experiences made me had a bit of distance with my other friends. My best friends from Junior and High School, and my closest friends in college, they said I had been gone this year, I felt it myself too. I felt incognito.
It saddened me a bit, but sorry was not enough to fix it. I believe in the word of make time for the one you love, because time is a precious thing.
Ups and downs, like everyone has. Good thing is, I finally found someone who made me much better than before - mentally. Remember my very messed up broke up with my ex? So after ups and downs, I met someone who really listen, and make time. He understands, and he doesn't sit down in silence, he encourages me to be better.
All the bitter things that I had before, made me more realistic about what love is. Don't be too much kiddo, don't swallow all the sweet things, remember to put your heads down when you're head over the heels. It will hurt a lot, when you love too much.
Just remember to love yourself better.
Music I heard in 2015 was something I really like. I started to recognize what kind of music I love to hear, and I listen to so many new artists! Okay, I'm getting excited, here are my favorites:
- Oh Wonder
- Banks (this one is not new but I play it on repeat)
- Shura (this is so good!!!)
- TAME IMPALA'S NEW ALBUM
- Made In Heights
Movies I loved, that I watched in 2015 were The Shining, and Dead Poet Society.
No further explanation needed :)
In short, 2015 had been a great year, and thanks God my main problem and anxiety was around my academic life. And THAT is a much improvement than 2014.
I stop making resolutions because I simply can't fulfill it, and make it true. To be more grateful, and have a courage will be my basic principles for the starter.
Wishing you a great year ahead, more adventurous things, and life lessons, of course.